Sunday, May 31, 2009

Just keep swimming.

Since I did 30 laps with front crawl last week, I thought I might push it a little by going swimming again.

For the first time in my life, I did 40 laps of front crawl!! And that's with 35 consecutive laps. Wahhh. I'm so proud of myself =))

Saturday, May 30, 2009

I am so so tired. I thought we could finally go overseas during this break before the beginning of the end, but it seems like life has a funny way of fouling your plans.

There are just so many things going on in my head that I don't think I can really take it anymore.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Leaving.

It's the 3rd last day of work and I'm starting to clear out everything from my desk.

4 months seems to be a short time, but in this time I've had friends with some really funny colleagues. It's almost hard to leave.

The thing is, the job is just not as fulfilling as I expected it to be. Okay, so I didn't really expect anything before that, but I certainly did not expect unprecendented amounts of time staring at the computer screen having nothing much to do except blogging or surfing forums. Now I know why Ridzuan always does that!

Well, I don't know if I will miss this yet. It's a little too short and a little too soon to tell. Perhaps the respite I am envisioning and the exercise regime I am planning will fall through, and I will want to come out in search of money again. Who knows?

One thing I know is, as this chapter closes, another surely opens wide open. And I have to step boldly into the unknown!


Romans 12

"Living then, as every one of you does, in pure grace, it's important that you not misinterpret yourselves as people who are bringing this goodness to God. No, God brings it all to you. The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us, not by what we are and what we do for him. "
-Romans 12:3

It struck me that learning to understand God more is actually a process of learning to understand myself more, since I am made from His image.

I do not add anything to God with my worship, praying or even helping others. Through all these though, I will learn more about myself.

I must say, I haven't really been reading my bible for some time. Maybe it's time to get back to it!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Choked Sink.

One blogs with the hope that whatever is felt within oneself can be shared with whoever that chances upon the little haven that one has built for himself.

There are certain things though, that cannot be shared. These are the things that stay clogged up in one's spirit, like a choked up sink. And that is exactly how I'm feeling now: like an old, choked up sink. For a while now, in fact.

It's an undercurrent of grouchiness coupled with irritation and a general feeling of disgust. I am hoping that this will go away with my leaving the company, but I really doubt so. After all, it has nothing much to do with the company.

I just need to scream it out, but I know I can't. Which really really sucks.

Argh.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Training Week #6

Well.. It was basically a hiatus from all exercise, so there's nothing much to report except for the run on Sunday. Which really shows why one should not stop exercising for prolonged periods.

The timing was slower than the first clocked timing. Ugh.

Activities:
24/5 Sunday - 4.5 km run / 4.2 km in 30 mins (7.1mins/km)(17.2 mins for 2.4)

Stats:
Height: 1.8 m
Weight: 82.5 kg
BMI: 25.46 kgm-2

ohfiveasssixaye EAT.SHOP.WATCH

turned out to be 3 dudes eating Banana Chocolate Cake and sipping Trung Nyugen Legendee Coffee.

It was quite a day filled with disappointment and exasperation as most who said they would come didn't, and those some that did treated it like a shopping spree, going on their way in their own selfish worlds.

I thought to myself, "I will never organise a class gathering for this class again". As what they say in the army, no one actually gives a shit. For the few that do, trust me, it's not worth it.

You know, it wasn't half bad. I managed to buy some shirts from Club Marc, the coffee was really good, and I managed to learn some barista stuff from Kelvin, but att the end of the day, I couldn't help but feel so pessimistic about it.

The least you could do when you go for a class gathering is to think about the class and not your own shopping. Haix.

Oh well, whatever!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Jumpstart Operation I.J.


I decided to go try out the EnergyOne Gym at Yishun SAFRA Country Club after a few days of trepidation. After all, it was a new environment which I knew nothing about. I didn't even know where it was even though I have been to SAFRA so many times! In my mind's eye, I was imagining personal trainers leering at me, observing my every move, just waiting for me to bungle up.

The fact was, it was surprisingly empty. And a little bit high on the Yang, if you get what I mean. If there's anything worse than a crowded gym with people staring angrily at you, it would be a desolate gym with men leering at you with thoughful eyes. -shivers-

I must say I was impressed with the locker room and showers though. I didn't have to bring a towel, and there was the soap/shampoo available right there.

Another plus was the fact that the receptionist girl looked quite cute with her geeky spectacles and pony tail. Just the type I like. Hahas.

Anyways! All this was an effort to jumpstart my dying engine. The momentum I built the past few weeks was more or less killed by my birthday week of expensive dinners, and the fact that they shut down kayaking water training. Now I can run only 4.2 km in 30 minutes, do only 6 chin-ups, and almost died in the gym doing chest presses.

So right here, I shall commence Operation I.J.! It stands for Increase Joy. Because Enqing said that exercise shouldn't be all about losing weight right? So here's the new philosophy: I exercise for endorphins! Hahas.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Clueless.

I am in one of my dark moods again and I'm wearing all black to celebrate that.

It has been going on for a while now, and the horrible class gathering yesterday just managed to exacerbate it. The thing is, I have been wondering about my passion and what I am good at. I have an idea, but I generally feel like a jack of all trades and a headless chicken.

It amazes me to see people who are working towards a certain goal. Becoming a teacher, doing sports photography, setting up blogshops.. Yet up till now, I don't really know what I am going after. Too much time thinking of nonsense and non-existent relationships, and so little time spent on thinking about what I want to do for the rest of my life.

A kayaker we knew passed away 3 days ago in MacRitchie. The first thing I thought of when I heard the news was, "At least he died doing something he loved". What could that be for me?

I love kayaking too. The feeling when you are paddling in water and the rest of the world seems to be less important.

I love writing. Talking to yourself as if the paper you write on can understand what you are trying to say to it.

Reading. Escaping into fantastical novels of intrigue or rags-to-riches stories, or conspiracy theories.

But seriously, I don't know. And the feeling of not knowing sucks. I wish I knew..

Saturday, May 23, 2009

"Toccata" and "Fugue" by J.S. Bach


I went searching for J.S. Bach online after piano lesson today. Here's an interesting YouTube video post I found. Apparently the guy who made the video made different midi files and fused them together to form the video. Very cool!

Friday, May 22, 2009

There is no truth. There is only perception.

So said Gustave Flaubert, the great French novelist, considered by most to be The Great French Realist.

Following recent Singaporean incidents such as the suicide of David Widjaja in NTU and the infamous AWARE saga, I am beginning to see why such philosophy exist.

How can one hope to know the true circumstance of things when everything is smeared with a cloud of opinion? One can think that the Josie Lau team were a group of radical Christians out to hijack a secular women's association to spread their personal beliefs, while another can think that the opposition old guard are promoters of homosexuality. There would be no end to it. It seems like we always tend to see the world in distinct ways: Christians hate homosexuals and plan to take over the world; Homosexuals plan to take over the world by turning everyone gay.

The thing is, most of the time, we just act according to what we think is right. And there are 6,706,993,152 different ways of doing what is right. What we see as methodological and organised takeovers of our society are nothing but the push and pulls of the aggregate values of Singapore. That is something we would have to face and find in ourselves to accept in all things

I do not believe that there is no truth, just that it is impossible to know it. Much like how it's impossible to see the two sides of the same coin in one glance, we can never know the entirety of Truth. Perhaps that's why we are embroiled in wars and conflicts, forever insisting on the authenticity of what our faction holds to be true.

One would think though, that the human race would one day cease to argue once they all realise that there would be no end to it.

Take for example Cheney's defence of the usage of torture in the interrogation of terrorists. There can be no end to such an argument. A security hawk would think that such criminals deserve the harshest punishment to exact the information they require while the opponents would see it as a breach of human rights. (Though if you really think about it, it would be quite funny to see the wardens pleading the terrorists to let on the location of bombs they have planted: "Hey man, can you please tell me where your buddies are going to crash the next plane?")

I guess at the end of the day its to each his own. We all have to seek our own truth.

Bowling Champion.

There was an SMa Bowling event going on at Mt Faber SAFRA yesterday and I got $133 richer from it.

This must be God's little reward for me for my work here. Hahas.. Anyway, it's official. I am having my last day on June 2. I really enjoyed myself here. But I guess there's never a neverending banquet. All good things come to an end as they say.

I'd miss you guys, EDC! and CCL!

Thursday, May 21, 2009

A Spot of Bother by Mark Haddon

A story about one George Hall slowly undergoing a bout of depression and panic attacks after finding a lesion at his hip which he suspects to be cancer. The novel pans out in the backdrop of his daughter, Katie getting remarried with Ray, an ultra safe and regular guy who is the exact opposite of her ex-husband.

As the story moves along, we find out the dark secrets of the Hall family: Jean, the Mother, is sleeping with George's ex-colleague. Jamie, the Son, is a homosexual who cares too much about how others might see his sexuality and hence is unwilling to commit to his relationship, and Katie, the Daughter, who marries a guy whom she is not sure that she loves but who would be able to provide her with all that she seeks.

The mode the novel was written in was confusing at the start, and it took a few chapters to get used to the jumping from a character view to another. Once you got used to it though, it felt to be an apt way of portraying the individual break-downs in relationships in each of the character's lives.

I especially liked the part where Katie discovered her love for Ray only after splitting up and questioning why she really wanted to marry him, and how Jamie realised his own iniquities after Tony left him in a hurry because he was not invited to Katie's wedding.

I guess it's very true that you will only find out what you treasure the most the moment you lose it.

The ending was happy and wholesome, with everyone finding their happiness and George regaining a certain sense of sanity by rejecting his panic.

A good read on the whole that allows the reader to really feel the panic and strange logic that bogged George throughout the novel and a good expository piece on our modern family and relational values.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Alma mater.

Well, it turned out better than we all expected it to.

The bottomline is, we get to continue as a CCA, and that is all that matters for now. What we really need to do is to prove that we have what it takes to achieve more. Come on J1s! You can do it!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Angels and Demons

So. I got jio-ed to watch Angels and Demons by Gracia and Yi Shin yesterday.

I must say it wasn't half bad, and the fact that the whole Vatican was reconstructed in a studio was very impressive.

Story wise, I didn't feel wowed, probably because I have read the story before. There wasn't much space for the actors to act, I felt. It was quite stifling because of the pace of the movie. You couldn't feel the deviousness of the Camerlengo or the wisdom of Robert Langdon. Very stiff.

Not very controversial either, probably because again, I've read the book before, and it seemed worse then.

3 stars!

Oh, the Makan Place near Great World is a different story though. I had a Prata Bomb with Cheese and it was absolutely fabulous. The Bandung was a little too sweet, but much better than most I've had. Wahhh

Pity I had to spend so much though.. Save save save!

Monday, May 18, 2009

Training Week #5

Signs that you are experiencing burnout:

  • Perpetual tiredness, even when you have just woken up from bed

  • Lack of motivation to exercise

  • Increased irritability
Looks like this is the record low on the amount of exercise done since the beginning of my regime. The fact that NYKRT stopped their water training does not help =/ I need new motivation!

Well, at least I lost weight. Hahas.

Activities:
13/5 Wednesday - 50 lap Swim @ Delta (2.5km)

Stats:
Height: 1.8 m
Weight: 83.0 kg
BMI: 25.6 kgm-2

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Training Week #4

Okay, so I didn't really exercise at all this last week. Pfft.

AND I GAINED A KAYGEE! FREAK.

Activities:
9/5 Saturday - Dragonboat
4/5 Friday - Gym (Abs & Shoulders) + 3km run

Stats:
Height: 1.8 m
Weight: 84.0 kg
BMI: 25.9 kgm-2

Unmotivated.

For two consecutive days, I have scheduled some kind of exercise but failed. That does not bode well for my training.. I am starting to feel my belly growing bigger. Urghs. =(

On a completely different note, I dreamt that I was in a swimming pool and I swam one whole breadth of the pool in one stroke and one breath after someone asked me something. Hm.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Inertia.

I have come to realise through personal experience that the less you do something, the more you irk doing it.

Take for example the slight hiatus from exercise last week. I figured I would bounce right back into running, gymming and swimming, but I had a really hard time convincing myself that I needed the exercise last night. All I wanted to do was to get more income from le Pad in Restaurant City and catch more mice with my brand new Ambush Trap. I was supposed to be running for 30 minutes. Right now, I am thinking of how dreadful it would feel to swim 50 laps later =/ Yet I know I would probably feel better once I get into the pool =D

The same principle applys for my Bible reading. Once upon a time, I was reading every day on the MRT. Right now, I'd much rather dig my head into Laughing Proudly Throughout the Pugilistic World to find out how Linghu Chong escapes the next death trap. Do I need to mention piano practice to prove my point?

The panacea, of course, is sheer discipline. Get back into doing whatever you were doing. Will yourself to get your butt off that chair and start tying your shoelaces. Perhaps all I need is to quit my job.. Hahas.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

21st!

Yes. I am one year older as of today. I chose not to have a mega celebration and invite all my friends but decided to stretch it over a few days and have nice long dinners with my friends at the expense of my belly =/

Anyways, thank you guys for spending my birthday with me and all the well-wishers! This is certainly my most crowded birthday thanks to Facebook. Hahas.. I bet I am the happiest and most blessed man today =)

Thanks to Jedit for the Joystick, Pinnice for the book, Cheeks for the messenger bag and Pam and Shu Juan for the cupcakes. Love all the presents! Hahas.. I feel so so SO loved!

I went to CityLink/Esplanade/Singapore Flyer together with Pamela and Shu Juan. We went to watch Esther perform at the Esplanade Concourse. Wahh.. Zai. If I can sing like that I will go and sign up for Superstar and become a Taiwanese pop star. Hahahas..

We spent the next half an hour trying to decide where to eat because we realised that Esplanade is devoid of good and cheap food =/ Ended up going for Popeyes' for their chicken!

Then we went up the Singapore Flyer since I've never taken it before (sua gu!) It was beautiful to see Singapore from up there. Yes, there was loads of construction going on, but Kallang Basin looked great. Plus the HDB flats going as far as my eyes could bring me was breathtaking too. Little did I know that the normally boring looking blocks could look so iconic together. I also remember thinking that I want to live in Pebble Bay when I have the money to buy an apartment there. It looks so striking and peaceful from up there!

After flying, we basically went for some drinks at Glutton's Bay and cabbed home. Thanks for the cupcakes girls!


Then came Thursday where I had KFC at my auntie's house for Mother's Day cum My Birthday cum My Auntie's Birthday celebration. Hahas.. I think I gained quite a lot of pounds from that meal man. There was the chicken, the watermelon, the cake, and red bean soup! Luckily it didn't turn out to be a KFC + Pizza Hut thing as planned. If not I will have to start thinking of going for liposuction to get rid of the fats le.

On Friday, JEDIT went to Timbre to celebrate. Overrated I say. The ambience wasn't really there, plus there was no real lights so we had to use their fake candles to see the menu. Bleh! Plus the steak was quite horrid. But I still had fun lah. It's not the place but the people mah. Thanks for the joystick guys!

We went to Cathay after Timbre for Ben and Jerry's ice cream in the hopes of finding the same green tee shirt girl we saw on Enqing's birthday. But no such luck! The two girls that day were quite cui. Hahas..

On the way, we saw the Nissan 350Z outside Cathay! Quite impressive. I like the colour.. Perhaps when (if) we get the Honda Jazz, we can spray it this colour!

Of course, there was the mandatory Dota session. Unfortunately AM didn't do so well that day. Hahas.. Oh well!

So that was about all. Thanks again guys! It was really really fun =D

可不可以爱我

在上教会的德士上听到的一首歌。觉得他的音色挺特别的。听听吧!

在此点给暗恋米兰的猪先生=)

Friday, May 08, 2009

Pillaged


There are good days on MouseHunt, and then there are bad days. Today is a bad bad bad day. My Maki cheese is running out, but still no sight of any Student of the Cheese Claw mice.

Looks like it's time to upgrade to a Zugzwang.

Nuah.

It's Friday! And I haven't worked out for the longest time. I can feel the strength sapping away from my body together with the endorphins. Ever since the gym session on Monday
- which wasn't much to speak of - I haven't lifted a single finger. Worse yet, I had cupcakes and Popeye's Chicken on Wednesday, KFC and cake yesterday, and I'm going to Timbre for more food tonight! All the hard work down the drain =/

That said, the past 2 nights have been quite fun. Hopefully tonight would be fun too! *ahem*DOTA!*ahem*

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Spiritual fats?!

"Therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us" Hebrews 12:1 (NIV)

"Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins." Hebrews 12:1b (MSG)

Dr Khoo preached on this verse last Sunday and taught how we should "throw off the weight that hinders". I got reminded of it while writing yesterday and thought how apt it is in my endeavour to lose weight. When I went to check up The Message, it says, "start running--and never quit! No extra fat". Wow. Amazingly prophetic.

So now my new exercise motto is: "Keep running, never quit, no extra fat!"

Okay, jokes aside, I wanted to talk a little about it because I was quite impacted on Sunday.

1. "Surounded by a great cloud of witnesses"
When I first read it, I thought it to mean non-believers. Jesus calls us to be the salt and light of the world, and to influence the people around us by our own exemplary action.

That of course, reminds me of the AWARE saga which portrayed less than exemplary acts by Christians. Usurping the exco positions of an association is hardly making positive impact, I feel. Oh wells, as the old axiom goes, "to err is human, to forgive divine". Now that everything is over, I just hope that people don't think that all Christians are homophobic and dogmatic crusaders. After all, Jesus taught us to love the sinner and hate the sin right?

I then realised that the great cloud of witnesses can apply to believers as well. What you do actually directly affects others in the church as we learnt in Youth Group on Sunday. Frankly speaking, I've been drifting away for a while now.. choosing to Laugh Proudly in the Pugilistic World. Hmm. Somehow it does affect how I operate at church or normally too..

2. "The sin that so easily entangles"

That can easily mean any sin. The Message calls it "parasitic sins" and Dr Khoo used the same term too. Anger, pride, striving, neglecting the welfare of our bodies.. Hmm. I would say that I am in a stage of my life right now where I'm taking care of my body. Haha.. And since nothing much is happening, I have nothing much to be angry about. Every day seems to be the same routine. I should start to think about quitting at the end of May. =/

3. "Run with perseverance the race marked out before us"

I take that to mean life. The Christian life, to be more exact. Hm. Well.. I still have a long way to go, and there are so many things that I want to do, so many places that I want to go. The thing is, often things don't go the way that I want it to go and we are often at the mercy of circumstances. To run with perseverance means to not be deterred by whatever that comes my way, but really just take it in stride.

I learnt something new at kayaking last Saturday when I was rowing on a K1. For the uninitiated, that's a single boat that is quite thin, making it quite difficult to balance. I have been rowing in the fatter Tourers for the whole of my JC, and I decided to try out K. So we were doing the triangles and I soon approached Benjamin Sheares Bridge which is a choppier part of the Kallang Basin because of the Duck Tours and the dragonboats going in and out..

The thing I learnt is, the more I stop to try to balance myself, the more unbalanced I am. In life, the choppier the sea is, often the best thing to do is really to just move forward regardless. Because the world will not stop spinning because you stopped. Only by moving forward can we overcome the difficulties that come our way. And the big waves are not so big anymore.

Philosophical eh?

Well, that's about all for today. Better get back to work. Hahas.. Ciao!

Monday, May 04, 2009

Lay off the weights.

I have an inkling why Enqing and Ivan don't like going to the gym. I'm starting to find it quite irritating too.

The fact that there are so many people squeezed in the same room together with you is a major turn off. The groups of guys who pretend they are working out when they are actually just talking to each other makes me just want to scream or kill somebody.

Plus the fact that everyone seems to be looking at what you are doing, which makes it feel like I'm in a zoo enclosure.

Pfft. Looks like I am not going to go back any time soon.

Anyways, I did my abs and lats pull-down plus bicep and tricep curls. Then I ran 3km in 20 minutes on the treadmill. I couldn't squeeze out the rest because frankly, I just wanted to get out of the place. Haha..

Training Week #3

I slacked off a bit this week, essentially just working out on Monday and Thursday. The badminton was not very strenuous but I guess kayaking training made up for it. Haha..

Did I mention how cute the J1s are? I must be getting old if J1s are starting to look young to me =/

Anyway, training will be affected this week since I would be having dinners here and there most of this week. Hopefully I don't gain weight! The highest I went to was 83.0kg and the lowest was 81.5kg. Unfortunately it didn't maintain and when I weighed myself this morning, it was still 83kg. Bleh.

Gymming later. Pray for people to stay at home because of swine flu and not go gym! Haha!

Activities:
2/5 Saturday - Kayaking Training
1/5 Friday - Badminton & Table tennis
30/4 Thursday - 60 lap swim @ Redhill (3km)
27/4 Monday - 5 km run in 30 minutes (6 mins/km)(14.4 mins for 2.4)

Stats:
Height: 1.8 m
Weight: 83.0 kg
BMI: 25.6 kgm-2

Sunday, May 03, 2009

青花瓷



青花瓷

曲:- 周杰倫
詞:- 方文山

素胚勾勒出青花筆鋒濃轉淡
瓶身描繪的牡丹一如妳初妝
冉冉檀香透過窗心事我了然
宣紙上走筆至此擱一半

釉色渲染仕女圖韻味被私藏
而妳嫣然的一笑如含苞待放
妳的美一縷飄散 去到我去不了的地方

#天青色等煙雨 而我在等妳
炊煙裊裊昇起 隔江千萬里
在瓶底書漢隸仿前朝的飄逸
就當我為遇見妳伏筆

*天青色等煙雨 而我在等妳
月色被打撈起 暈開了結局
如傳世的青花瓷自顧自美麗
妳眼帶笑意

色白花青的錦鯉躍然於碗底
臨摹宋體落款時卻惦記著妳
妳隱藏在窯燒裡千年的秘密
極細膩猶如繡花針落地

簾外芭蕉惹驟雨門環惹銅綠
而我路過那江南小鎮惹了妳
在潑墨山水畫裡 妳從墨色深處被隱去

#*#*

This is, in my opinion, Jay Chou's best written song ever. I just heard it on iTunes again and it brought back so many memories of our bunk in Seletar Camp and the fun we had singing to each other. Hahas..

For those who can't really read Chinese, the song speaks of one who waits for his lover, and describes their love as one that is carved on porcelain, their memories inscribed in life and their hearts like paintings on porcelain forever. The sadness and pain of separation will eventually fade, but the love will stay on forever.

The title of the song describes a type of porcelain that is very hard to make, requiring the last day of manufacture to be a rainy day to achieve the special green which makes it so special, thus the "天青色等煙雨"

Save save save!

Another major bleed-out day of DotA and cabbing. I'm starting to really feel the pinch since I am spending the money I earned from staring at the computer every day. =/

I shall start working on a budget on how much I can spend and stick to it. If not arh, surely won't have enough money during University.

Haix. Why am I not born with a jade spoon in my mouth?

Saturday, May 02, 2009

Labour Day.

We went playing badminton and a little bit of table-tennis yesterday at Tampines SAFRA. It's been so long since JEDIT did something strenuous together! Hahas.. Gym swim does not count!

It felt good to be sweating and using my bag of bones. We haven't played badminton in a while, have we?

Got a chance to try playing ping pong too after watching Table of Glory on Channel 8 for so long. Wah.. So reminiscent of Primary School lorh. Those were the days of smelly armpits and smacking ping-pong balls here and there. Lol!

Anyways, we went watching X-Men Origins: Wolverine after that. Not bad at all. 4 stars! I felt the action was pretty well balanced with the story line. The only complaint is that there was no real climax to the movie. I left feeling informed, but not wowed. Plus the scene with the head that was cut off twirling round and round with laser eyes on just wasn't realistic. Maybe even a little ridiculous. Hahas..

Well, at least I didn't feel like I paid for a shitty show.

Amazingly, we didn't play Left 4 Dead or DotA at all! Wow. That's an achievement.
 
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