Studies.

I just finished a long overdue session of listening to Fu Qiang's webcast lecture and I am finally feeling a little bit of accomplishment from knowing what exactly I am studying. I know full well that the past few weeks and the midterms were below my personal expectations and I am really trying to claw my way back into the mood of studying again. I guess I can't really blame anything or anyone but myself for being so distracted lately.

I got back my Stats results today. A meagre 19 upon 25 which puts me below the 50th percentile in the whole Stats tutorial class. Absolutely disgusting, Dezhi. What in the world are you doing? Right now I am just waiting for the results for Management Science and I would more or less have a fuller picture of what my CAP would be like. Hopefully Project Become-A-Genius-In-6-Weeks would actually work within the next 6 weeks...

If there is something I have learnt in these past weeks, it's that no one else is responsible for your learning, and that you really can choose your choices. You can even choose how you would want to feel to certain situations or circumstances in your life. I allowed that whole drama to affect me too much and consequently everything went awry. Yet I just take a look around, I would be able to see so many other people who have things going on in their lives as well, but are doing much better than me. A lesson in humility and in self-control is in order, it seems.

That said, I am still trying to find my path in University. I am finally starting to feel like I can integrate into all these and take my work seriously. I am also starting to feel more "formed" as a person as I see where my priorities lie, where my strengths are and what my beliefs are. Isn't it wonderful how God puts all things together in such brilliant clarity when just the year before I was looking for my direction? Trusting God to lead me in ways everlasting!

Alrights. I think I have typed enough. I should probably sleep or risk missing my subject pool tomorrow. Until the next typing diarrhoea!

xoxo