piano weeping memories.

I have been hooked to watching Lang Lang videos on YouTube lately. If you don't already know who is Lang Lang, he is a fat Chinese pianist who happens to be a genius. It's quite funny to watch the videos, because he is such an animated pianist. I somehow feel more drawn to Yundi Li though, because he fits my perceived image of a pianist better. He feels more dignified and reserved as compared to the explosive and feisty Lang Lang. Anyways, this all started when my piano teacher, Ms Goh, got me to watch the video of Lang Lang playing Chopin using an orange... It's totally random, I know!

Anyways, one of my men cried today. I realised that I can't really understand men crying... Yes, I get why he cried, but I just felt that it was excessively emo on his part. I think all the rejection I got is starting to cause me to withdraw from normal emotional reactions and causing me to be more indifferent to other's emotional needs (I read all this in a book). Can this all be true? Hmm. Maybe I should have said what I felt then.. Alas, all is lost!

I've been having this same scene of studying in Nanyang outside the LTs on the ground level. It was one of the days where we were studying for A levels there. It was also around there where we had rehearsals for Chinese Drama Night. Somehow the scene is particularly vivid in my mind: the red walls, yellow doors, long stairs up, five of us studying... Those were the days when I really felt that I had people caring for me. Right now we are all so busy with our own new lives, and non-lives for some, that it's impossible to recreate that again. I miss school!!! University come quickly!

不能说的秘密

Forget sad, you emo bitch!
Remember happy. I'm happy!

Top Ten Things I Want If I Had My Way For My Birthday

1. Love!
   
   So cheesy, I know. Hee.
   


2. Get into Law School.
   Hopefully the interviewers found what I said interesting and funny enough to consider me. And maybe NUS might finally ask me to go in for interviews. A perfect score ain't the world you know! What happened to EQUAL OPPORTUNITIES?
   


3. Mini Cooper S Cabrio
   
   A convertible Mini! That's like. The ULTIMATE DREAM CAR!
   


4. MacBook Pro
   
   A staple for every mindless Mac-loving freak.
   


5. Sony Ericsson W910i
   
   Eh it won the Best GSM Phone award okae! Don't play play ah! Hmm.. Should I get black or white?
   


6. A leather slingbag to replace my old black OP sling bag. Fossil has some nice bags you know.. but someone I never got around to buying them.
   


7. Canon IXUS 75
   
   Snap snap! So that I can cam-whore. It's so difficult with my Lumix lorh!
   


8. SGD 1,000,000 to drop from the sky onto my lap.
   
   
9. Lose weight!
   
   
10. For the whole world to be happy so that we would stop warring and start doing something concrete about global warming and our exploding population. Like migrating to the moon.
    

live well.

Something really dramatic happened yesterday at G4 Branch cohesion dinner, or as what G4 would like to put it, "just dinner". RQ was chatting happily to us when she suddenly felt numbness in her back which eventually spread to the left side of her face and the arm. Her face contorted with pain as she grasped her forehead in anguish. Ahhhhh....

After a lot of massaging for her, she was better. We called the ambulance and sent her to the hospital just to make sure she was alright. You know, that was the first time I really saw paramedics in action. There were many times when I saw them in a distance, pushing some old lady into the ambulance but never really this up close. I was kind of scared that something serious would have happened too...

Anyways, I went down to NUH in G4's car to find out how she was. Turns out that even in A&E, you would have to wait for 4 hours before you even get to see the doctor. If I were having a mild stroke that was not detected (as what this case might be), I would have died. Isn't there any way they can speed up the process? Doctors of the future, think about this! This is supposed to be the frontline we are talking about here man!

We waited all the way from 6.30pm to about 10.30pm for her to be warded for observation. So far her ECG was alright, and the doctor said that there was nothing perceivably wrong with her, but they just wanted to keep her there for some observation since that was the third of the same case that day. I hope that everything is alright!! Life without RQ in QM branch would be a nightmare...

On a side note, NUH has a horrible structure. It takes more than 20 mins to get from the A&E to the patient wards at Kent Ridge Wing 2. Couldn't they just have a central atrium for people to find their way instead of winding in and out of everywhere? Grrr...

It also struck me in this episode how as people we can be so "cool" or just nonchalant about others. I guess that as I grow up, I will become like that too... losing all the concern for others, only caring about myself. Is there any way to escape that? I certainly hope so..

I am also reminded that anything can happen at any time, and that each every little thing is precious. Treasure the people around you and love them! For none of us know the time and day... I know it's cliché but really. So to everyone who knows me, know that I love you okae! Hahas.

American Idol Gives Back: Daughtry

I was watching AI Gives Back the other day and this video really caught my eye. I guess it was how the music was able to touch the kids in Uganda. Kinda cool really. I'd be hypocritical if I said I really cared for them, but it was moving for me. And the fact that Daughtry sounded so good was a plus. =)

The lyrics are quite meaningful too. Unfortunately I don't have someone to sing this to. LOL!

What About Now
Daughtry

Shadows fill an empty heart
As love is fading,
From all the things that we are
But are not saying.
Can we see beyond the scars
And make it to the dawn?

Change the colors of the sky.
And open up to
The ways you made me feel alive,
The ways I loved you.
For all the things that never died,
To make it through the night,
Love will find you.

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?

The sun is breaking in your eyes
To start a new day.
This broken heart can still survive
With a touch of your grace.
Shadows fade into the light.
I am by your side,
Where love will find you.

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love, it never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?

Now that we're here,
Now that we've come this far,
Just hold on.
There is nothing to fear,
For I am right beside you.
For all my life,
I am yours.

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?

What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
Baby, before it's too late,
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?